Suicidal but not willing to do anything?

If you are serious about wanting to improve your life, then you need to accept the fact that you are going to need outside help. You don't feel like doing anything at all because you are depressed & you need help to get better. Most colleges have a student health department. Go there & ask for help. Feeling suicidal is nothing to fool around with. That's serious stuff. And don't worry about them being judgemental, that's not what they are about.